Taking a passive approach in the workplace could mean that you miss out on career-changing opportunities, which encourages some employees to develop their influencing skills.

When the term influencing comes to mind, some people may believe that only a hard-line method applies, but this is not the case. Forcing others to work in a way you prefer, either by using aggressive tactics or introducing 'punishments' such as reduced bonuses generally only fosters an atmosphere of fear and resentment. These negative ploys are not usually believed to be effective when it comes to influencing others, as colleagues/clients may well remember feeling pushed into making decisions they do not feel is right for them - which could hamper long-term working relationships.

Influencing or manipulating?

Many consumers have been the subject of hard-sell techniques, and have left retailers with goods that they'll never use. Worse, if they have purchased against their instincts, then they may think negatively about the company concerned and avoid it in future, or be reluctant to do business with the organisation again. So where is the line drawn between influencing and manipulating?

As mentioned above, influencing skills do not entail you being pushy, but generally turning the other person's mind to appreciate your products or services. In order to do this you need to have a great understanding of yourself (so you are able to recognise aggressive-type behaviour) and the person you aim to do business with.

Developing understanding

It's important to get an accurate perspective on the potential client's situation and thoughts as you may be required to adapt situations/contracts to suit them, instead of pushing them into decisions that make them uncomfortable. In order to get both parties and more in agreement, experts recommend developing and utilising persuading skills. In these situations it's essential that you rely on logic, rather than emotion, when showing the virtues of your plans.

This approach twinned with focusing on the wishes of prospective clients will ease their fears that you intend to force your own plans on them. Positive body language and wording can greatly help you to get your message across in an open and assertive way, and fosters a feeling of familiarity between you and firms.

The next step

Putting all this into practice will allow you to successfully persuade via learnt negotiating skills. This is where you may move from being a passive observer in workplace meetings to a seasoned influencer/persuader. You should work towards: developing a sense of camaraderie, an amenable environment and follow-up sessions, in case agreement is not reached.

In this sense, influencing is more about truly believing that your options are best for all concerned, rather than fooling clients into thinking they need your services, when you feel they could get by without them. As mentioned earlier, camaraderie is developed when you point out common ground and agree to work towards an outcome that is win-win for both parties involved. An amenable environment is less likely to lead to potential clients feeling negative about your suggestions and gives them a safe place to mention any perceived problems, so you're able to tackle them using reason and logic.

Open body language and steering away from aggressive language can all help to create a positive environment. Even if it feels like your best influencing efforts are not having the impact that you want, it's essential to remain in this positive frame of mind. In these situations, you could try and set up further meetings or move the goalposts and change the levels of compromise.