Developing good listening skills does not mean becoming an agony aunt. You can listen to your Aunt Edith prattle on four three hours without saying a word and she will tell all her friends what a wonderful listener you are. Unfortunately in the workplace this does not make you a good listener, as it has achieved no purpose or productive outcome. It is not your job to make your employees happy by listening to them whinge. Effective communication is about developing your listening skills so that you can get to the point and gain knowledge in order to act and achieve a goal.

Begin cultivating your listening skills by considering how you listen to your staff. When a person is talking to you, do you stop what you are doing and give them your full attention? Are you always distracted and attempting to multi-task by typing while they are talking? Do you have an open door policy so staff feel you are approachable and welcome their comments? Think about how you would like someone to communicate with you if you had something to say. If you are busy then make your staff aware of the fact that you don't want to be disturbed for an hour or so. If you are interrupted frequently then ask the person to come back at a convenient time for you both so you can give them your full attention. When people feel that you are focusing on them then they believe that you are interested in what they have to say and will feel validated and respected. This will generate a healthy working relationship with your staff.

I once worked in an office team that dealt with pension transfers. One of the ladies that I worked with was very intelligent, but often lacked people skills. I found one particular meeting very frustrating since everyone present had very strong opinions on the topic and wanted to get their ideas across. This led to everyone trying to over talk everyone else and it became clear that nobody was really listening to anybody. I listened carefully to what people were saying since I was taking the minutes, but every time I tried to make a point, the other lady interrupted me with a contrary opinion. It is vital when listening to a person that you do not interrupt them. Interrupting their speech will make them feel angry and give the impression that you do not care about what they have to say. This will lead them to be uncaring of what you have to say and the structure of the conversation will break down. If someone is continually interrupting you then take action. Calmly but firmly state that you re becoming offended at the constant interruptions, especially since you have had the decency to listen to their side of the conversation.

It is possible that some people will talk for a long time without ever getting to the point. In this situation it is your job to draw out of them the purpose of their speech. Tell them that you have listened to them, but are unsure of what the real issue is and ask them to clarify it concisely. This will let them know that you want to hear what they have to say. When they are finished speaking, sum up the main points of the dialogue. Giving the other person a quick summary of what they said is a good tool to show that you have listened and properly taken in what they have said. If there is anything you are unsure about then ask the other person to clarify the query in order to show that you would like to know more on the subject. Asking for further information also demonstrates that you are not simply rushing the conversation in order to move on.

Being a good listener is recognising that whatever you say there will invariably be a response from the person you are communicating with, be it positive or negative. It is important not to be dismissive of these responses since they will give you information. If you have asked an employee to carry out a task and they give a positive response then you can be assured that they will attempt to carry out your wishes to the best of their ability. If they are negative then you may need to keep a closer watch on the situation and find out why they are negative. For example, they may not have the skills necessary and will require training. Whatever the response, this should also be forming part of the employees appraisals so should be listened to carefully. Try to remember that no response is invalid.